I must confess that there are days when I wish that I did not know what I know about online child exploitation. There are days when I feel relieved that I haven't come across a story about a pedophile being convicted and receiving a sentence more just of petty theft than the theft of a child's innocence. There are days when I wish that the need for an organization that creates awareness, advocates and supports children who are victims of the most horrific abuse was unnecessary. Those days typically end with me lamenting on how I wish this issue wasn't real, wasn't something that so many children endure...
I was having one of those days a few weeks ago when out of the blue I was contacted by someone who had been introduced to the Mothers Online Movement cause page on Facebook. He told me a story about a situation he had encountered in a previous job where he had become in his words "pretty good pals" with a colleague on his team, their families had also become acquaintances. A couple of years after they had met two police officers showed up at the office where they worked, arrested his colleague and removed his laptop and desktop. He later received a call from his wife telling him that she had received a call from the wife of his colleague who was hysterical because her husband had been arrested on suspicion of collecting and distributing child pornography.
The impact of this information which proved to be true was devastating obviously on the victims and family, but the story also gave another perspective, that of the friend. It was very sad to hear how deeply the friend had been impacted, the concern he had for his own family and the risk his relationship may have put them in, the worry of what people might think of his friendship and his own inner questioning of why he hadn't had any suspicion.
That day I also read the story of John Wrenshall a 62-year-old Canadian arrested that week after being indicted on 18 counts related to child exploitation. He allegedly arranged for tourists to sexually abuse prepubescent boys and take pictures and videos of the abuse all the while teaching at a prestigious English school in Bangkok, Thailand. As we hear time and time again, this individual had been convicted twice before in Calgary after admitting to sex related charges involving as many as 20 young boys he met as a scout master and church choir member.
As I think of the perspective told by my Facebook contact - it made me think about how many others have felt the impact of Wrenshall's abuse? - acquaintances who trusted him as a friend, parents of the children he abused, employers and community organizers who thought he was a good man ... all of these individuals now questioning "how could this happen?"
Unfortunately - it does happen and far too often the child knows their abuser, in fact 96% of the time it's someone within their circle of trust. The individuals who abuse operate on trust and spend all their time finding ways to build trust. This is why when it happens we are left asking so many questions. This is why I share what I wish I didn't know about the sexual abuse and online exploitation of children and why I thank the media for reminding us that this issue is real and why the Mothers Online Movement has an important role to play as a voice for the children who are the innocent victims.
Paula KnightMothers Online Movement (MOM) Founder andKINSA Advisory Boardwww.mothersonlinemovement.ca
Labels: Mothers Online Movement